SOLVED with Mark Manson

Fail fast. Fail forward. Fail better. As a society, we’ve turned failure into a slogan to celebrate, but somehow we’re more afraid of it than ever. So what's going on? Most of us say failure is our best teacher, but I doubt many of you have ever walked away from a failure doing a happy dance. IInstead, you probably let the moment rattle around in your head at some ungodly hour, then played it a little safer the next time. Don't worry, you're not the only one. Today, Drew and I break down why every piece of advice you've ever received about failure has, well… failed you. We cover why indulging in "failure porn" is such a harmful move and what it actually takes to learn from our mistakes (it's not what you think). We explain the evolutionary reason a rejected email can feel threatening. We tell the story of how a country's inability to admit failure got thousands killed, and of a monk so tormented by his failures that he confessed them for six hours a day. We dive into the three different kinds of failure and…

You've been told your whole life to explore, keep your options open, try new things. And you've done exactly that. Moved cities, pivoted careers, taken every personality quiz. But here's what nobody warns you about: all that freedom might be the thing keeping you stuck. This episode digs into a depressed 19th century Danish philosopher who diagnosed our entire modern crisis 180 years before we lived it. We tell the story of Casanova, history's most famous fuckboy, who had more adventures than anyone alive and died completely alone with nothing but 2,000 pages of memories nobody believed. We break down Dan Gilbert's research on why your brain is actually better at justifying your choices than you give it credit for. We walk through Kierkegaard's three stages of commitment, from the aesthetic life of endless options to the point where commitment stops feeling like a choice at all. And we talk about the grief that nobody tells you about when you finally pick one life and let all the others go. Get your free…

Ask most successful people how they got where they are, and the answer is usually some version of "good timing." Everyone else swears they earned it. We're terrible at seeing our own luck clearly, and even worse at realizing how much of it we could create. In this episode, Drew and I get into why: the psychology that makes us deny luck even exists, and what changes the moment you stop pretending everything is earned. We start with Warren Buffett - why a man worth tens of billions says the single most important thing that ever happened to him was where and when he was born. Then there's Napoleon, who picked his generals by skipping the résumé and asking one question: "Is he lucky?" And we brought in Annie Duke, a former World Series of Poker champion who’s spent more than a decade studying decision-making, to explain why we keep confusing good decisions with lucky outcomes. There's also a stretch on survivorship bias that'll make you rethink every success story you've ever heard. Luck comes in three layers.…

Confidence isn't something you build. It's what's left over. You've done the pose. Hands on hips, chest out, an affirmation on a sticky note stuck to the mirror. And then you walked into the room feeling exactly the same, or worse. Here's what nobody tells you: the entire concept of confidence you've been sold was invented by an anxious preacher in the 1940s who mistook his own coping mechanism for a universal law. The research is even uglier. Affirmations reliably make insecure people feel less secure. Visualizing success decreases motivation. The most famous confidence technique in history was built on a study of 42 people that the lead author eventually had to abandon. In this episode we trace where it all went wrong, from Norman Vincent Peale to power poses to the self-esteem movement that quietly failed a whole generation. Then we get into what actually works: a discovery made in a room full of snakes, a 2,000-year-old framework that turns out to be empirically correct, and why the sequence runs exactly…

If you've ever tried to change something about yourself, failed, tried again, and concluded you must just be broken, here's some good news: you're probably not broken. You've just been aiming at the wrong target for years. Who you are is actually a layered system. Most people fail at change because they treat behaviors like permanent traits and traits like behaviors they can flip overnight, spending years aiming at the wrong layer. In this episode, Drew and I map out the full system. This is the longest and most personal episode we've ever done. Get the free PDF episode guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/change/ CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: What Does It Mean to Change? 00:13:18 The Dictionary Study: How 17,953 Words Led to the Big Five 00:49:06 Chapter 2: Why the Myers-Briggs Is Basically a Horoscope for Smart People 01:02:17 The Barnum Effect: Why We Believe Tests That Tell Us Nothing 01:20:52 The Maturity Principle: How Personality Drifts With Age 01:36:08 Chapter 3: Layer Two: Your Adaptations…

Why do smart, emotionally aware people stay in relationships that are clearly destroying them? Drew and I dug into the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard marriage, to walk through the seven psychological mechanisms that quietly lock people inside bad relationships and make leaving feel impossible. If you have ever watched someone you love stay in a relationship that is destroying them, or if you have been that person yourself, this episode will shine a lot of light on what is really going on under the hood. Get your free episode guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/bad-relationships/ CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: When Smart People Stay Stuck in Bad Relationships 00:05:05 Meet Johnny Depp: From Kentucky to Captain Jack Sparrow 00:12:44 Meet Amber Heard: Growing Up in Texas and Breaking Into Hollywood 00:14:40 Mechanism #1: Normalization - The Water You Swim In 00:25:11 Mechanism #2: The Identity Trap - Filling the Void 00:40:07 Mechanism #3: The Slot Machine Effect - Addicted to Volatility 00:47:08 The…

Here's the uncomfortable truth about anxiety: most of what people reach for to fix it was chosen because it feels easy, not because it works. The supplement that went viral on TikTok, the CBD gummy, the glass of wine after a hard week... they range from doing nothing to actively making things worse. We ranked 17 of the most popular anti-anxiety interventions from the absolute worst to the number one most effective, according to the research. Along the way, we get into why alcohol is the anxiety cure that 2 billion people use that actually creates more anxiety in the long run. We talk about the UGC marketing conspiracy behind the magnesium craze. We break down the difference between harmonious and obsessive anxiety, why your brain is literally doing therapy on itself every night while you sleep (and what happens when you don't let it), and why exercise is essentially practice for being afraid. The pattern that emerges is painfully clear: everything that actually works is a lifestyle change, and everything…

It's been one year of SOLVED. 20 episodes, 20 million downloads, 3 million YouTube subscribers, and a truly unreasonable number of poop jokes. To celebrate, I sat down with over 200 of your questions and picked the ones that hit the hardest. We get into why most people fail at quitting addictions (hint: the problem isn't the feelings, it's that you never planned for them). I explain why, if you have ADHD and can't stop procrastinating, you need to treat yourself like a dog that shits on the carpet. We talk about the real science behind manifestation, why it sort of works but not for the reason TikTok thinks it does. I break down the difference between trait confidence and state confidence, and why "build evidence" is only half the equation. We cover how to handle panic attacks, getting over a "perfect" ex (spoiler: they're not perfect, and thinking they are is the problem), the uncomfortable truth about self-love, the difference between a boring relationship and being bored in a relationship, the purpose vs.…

Nearly 60% of American workers are checked out at their jobs. Meanwhile, every graduation speech in history tells you to follow your passion and you'll never work a day in your life. So which is it? In this episode, Drew and I debate both sides. I argue for passion. He argues for practicality. And what we discover along the way is that the whole question is kind of a false dichotomy. We get into the psychology of harmonious vs. obsessive passion (and why one leads to fulfillment while the other led Kurt Cobain to write "I don't have the passion anymore" in his suicide note). We talk survivorship bias, Maslow's hierarchy, and why financial stress literally impairs your ability to think creatively. I share the story of quitting my investment bank job at 24, living on a friend's futon, and knowing within a month that I was never going back. We look at how Jane Goodall took a secretarial job and stumbled into becoming the world's preeminent primatologist. And we land on a phrase I think is way more useful than…

We pulled over 2,600 studies and ranked 19 of the most common self-improvement techniques across three dimensions: research quality, consistency of results, and actual effect size. Then we sorted them into four tiers: legitimately works, works sometimes, probably not helping, and straight up bullshit. Microdosing landed in the bullshit tier. Crystal healing outperformed several "serious" techniques. And the number one most effective strategy is something so stupidly simple it's almost annoying. We also get into why everything at the bottom of the list shares one thing in common, why the middle of the list is mostly a fancy placebo, and why nearly everything at the top has been around for thousands of years. Get your free episode guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/self-help/ CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:06:02 Category 4: Bullsh*t 00:06:13 Suppressing Negative Thoughts 00:10:53 Microdosing Psychedelics 00:17:29 Intuitive Decision-Making 00:24:11 Catharsis / Venting Anger 00:27:29 Category 3:…

Meditation has been sold to us as a magic pill for so long that the backlash is almost as overblown as the hype. I spent years deep in Buddhist practice, went on retreats, meditated daily — and then slowly discovered that half the gurus evangelizing it were alcoholics, abusers, or running Rolls-Royce-funded cults. Here's what the more careful research actually shows: there are three things meditation does reliably well, and they’re probably not what you've been promised. More importantly, almost everything you've been told about how to do it is wrong — starting with the idea that the goal is to quiet your mind. If your brain turns into a chaotic mess the moment you close your eyes, that's not a failure. That's the whole point. Get your free episode guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/meditation/ CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:08:15 Skeptic Claim #1: Meditation Is Overhyped 00:22:45 Skeptic Claim #2: "Meditation Isn't for Me" 00:41:36 Meditation Isn't Safe or Helpful for Everyone 00:48:33 Skeptic…

Focus is one of those things everyone swears they need more of and almost no one is actually addressing correctly. In this episode, we dig into what the science actually says about attention spans (hint: your brain isn't broken, it's just overwhelmed), why the standard advice to "try harder" is probably making things worse, and what's really driving your inability to sit down and get things done. We get into the neuroscience of explore vs. exploit modes, why flow states feel the way they do, and the four hidden triggers behind most focus problems, none of which have anything to do with your phone. Then we get into the practical stuff: environmental design, deep work frameworks, the maker vs. manager schedule, time boxing, batching, and why a dentist appointment in the middle of your morning can ruin your entire day. If you're the kind of person who opens 14 browser tabs, switches between them for 40 minutes, and calls that "working", well, this one's for you. Get the free guide for this episode:…

We put love on trial — literally. Drew and I squared off in a full debate over whether romantic love is overrated. I made the case that love is basically your brain's con man, a neurochemical hijacking designed to make you delusional about deeply flawed people, and that the most intoxicating relationships are often the most toxic. Drew fought back with the evidence that love is the foundation of social infrastructure, physical health, and long-term happiness. By the end, we came to a gentlemen’s agreement: a framework that explains why we're all chasing the wrong kind of love, and what the right kind actually looks like. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:02:21 Round 1: Love is the Brain's Conman 00:23:33 Round 2: Love as Social Infrastructure 00:43:48 Round 3: Love and Happiness 01:05:29 Round 4: Why We're Drawn to People Who Hurt Us ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://go.markmanson.net/cdi1xzha ⇨ Get clarity on what actually…

Most people aren’t bad at dating, they’re just trying to solve the wrong problem. We treat dating like a personality test (“Am I attractive enough? Confident enough?”) when it’s actually a multi-stage process, and each stage punishes completely different mistakes. That one misunderstanding explains why dating feels so confusing, why men and women keep blaming each other, why dating apps feel brutal, and why so much dating advice makes things worse instead of better. In this episode of Solved, Drew and I break down why modern dating feels so broken, and why it actually isn’t. We dig into the evolutionary psychology behind attraction, why men and women are optimizing for different things, how modern culture and dating apps amplify the worst parts of the system, and the three stages of dating that almost nobody understands. We also talk about confidence, rejection, status, attraction, and why avoiding rejection is often the very thing sabotaging your dating life. If you’ve felt stuck, burned out, or quietly…

Most people think ego is either something you need to kill off entirely or inflate to take over the world. Both are wrong. In this episode, we dig deep into what ego actually is—how it evolved, why it matters, and how it secretly runs your life without you realizing it. We hit Freud, Buddhism, David Hume, Jung’s shadow self, and even the Navy SEALs to unpack why your ego isn’t always the enemy—it’s mostly just misunderstood. Then we get into how to quiet your ego without losing your identity, and yes, we talk psychedelics, too. This is everything you were never taught about ego—but should’ve been. Get your free PDF guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/ego CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:03:31 What Is the Ego? 00:10:15 The Architecture and Function of the Ego 00:27:15 What is a Healthy Ego? 00:36:14 The Philosophical Divide: Two Cultures, Two Selves 00:49:29 The Ego’s Evolutionary Architecture — How Evolution Built the Self 00:49:33 Why Evolution Invented “I” 00:51:46 The Architecture of the Ego: From…

This is probably the most comprehensive, no-BS breakdown of boundaries you're going to find anywhere. We cover what boundaries actually are (spoiler: it’s not just telling people to f*ck off), why they matter more than you think, and how your entire life—your relationships, mental health, identity, even career—is quietly shaped by whether or not you have them. By the end of this, you’ll know exactly how to set boundaries, how to enforce them without being a jerk, and how to stop confusing your preferences, rules, and passive-aggressive texts for actual emotional maturity. Plus, we talk about how the internet has totally mangled this concept and what to do instead. If you’ve ever felt burned out, resentful, overwhelmed, or just vaguely annoyed by everyone around you, this is for you. Get your free PDF guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/boundaries CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:29 Foundations of Boundaries 00:02:05 The Breakdown: What boundaries actually are (and aren’t) 00:04:42 The Spectrum:…

This one’s different. In this special year-end episode, I answer your questions—from the deep stuff about purpose and motivation, to the uncomfortable realities of change, burnout, failure, and dealing with unsupportive family. I also share the behind-the-scenes chaos of building SOLVED this year, what I learned about making massive, meaningful content, and what’s coming in 2026 (spoiler: boundaries, ego, and maybe some live shows). This is part personal, part philosophical, and part therapy session disguised as a podcast. If you’ve been wondering what’s next—or why you feel stuck—this one’s for you. See you in 2026. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:13 Recap of 2025 00:03:42 What if I don't have a single purpose? 00:06:07 Why don't I feel a strong need for purpose? 00:08:32 How do I find purpose when doing things I don't find important? 00:12:34 I'm having issues on getting motivated on one thing 00:19:35 What if my family doesn't support my purpose? 00:23:15 I'm struggling with the idea that…

This is the episode I’ve been waiting to make for a long time. Purpose has been at the core of everything I’ve written and done for over a decade—and in this episode, we go all the way down the rabbit hole. From Viktor Frankl surviving Auschwitz to the myth of “finding your one true purpose,” we break down what purpose really is, why you feel lost without it, and how you can build it into your life. We also get uncomfortable (in the best way) and talk about the dark side of purpose—how it can burn you out, trap you in toxic ambition, or become an excuse to ruin your life. And I have a very special announcement to make: Today, I’m launching a new app called Purpose. It’s an AI-powered mentor for personal growth. You talk to it about whatever you’re facing—stress, decisions, conflicts, goals—and it helps you make sense of things. Purpose listens, reflects back what matters most, and turns big challenges into small, actionable steps. The more you use it, the more personalized and helpful it becomes. CHAPTERS…

We all compare ourselves to other people—our friends, coworkers, strangers on the internet—and most of the time, it makes us feel like shit. But why do we keep doing it? In this episode of Solved, we dig into the uncomfortable truth behind social comparison, how it quietly ruins our self-worth, and why most of what we envy in others is a projection of our own insecurity. We also get into the brutal paradox of success, the toxic loop of chasing status, and how the constant measurement of our lives against others is one of the dumbest things we do as a species. If you’ve ever felt not good enough, or like you’re falling behind, this one’s for you. Get your free PDF guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/socialcomparison CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:05:29 Evolutionary Roots 00:16:20 The Emotional Toolkit 00:20:18 Philosophy and Social Comparison 00:23:31 The Buddhist Path 00:24:58 Aristotle 00:34:34 Stoicism 00:36:24 Existentialism 00:40:06 Myths 00:48:37 The Psychology of Social Comparison 00:58:54…

Friendship is the most important thing nobody talks about. From ancient philosophy to game theory, we break down why friendship isn’t just some social nicety—it’s a biological survival strategy. Plus: the modern forces slowly strangling our ability to connect, and exactly what to do about it. You’ll walk away with a clearer sense of what real friendship looks like, how to build it, and how to stop shooting yourself in the foot every time you try. Get your free PDF guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/friendship CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:07:52 Friendship: an Evolutionary Puzzle 00:25:45 What Is Friendship? 00:27:11 Friendship in the Great Religious Traditions 00:37:21 Modern Psychology's Definition of Friendship 00:49:02 Your Brain On Friendship 01:03:34 The Neurobiology of Connection 01:22:48 Health Benefits of Friendship 01:33:11 How to Make and Maintain Friendships 01:35:19 Proximity and Repeated Contact and Reciprocal Disclosure 01:53:51 Time investment (quantity and cadence) 01:58:15…

What does it actually mean to live like a Stoic? In this wide-ranging conversation with bestselling author and modern Stoicism evangelist Ryan Holiday, we unpack the origins of Stoic philosophy, why it exploded during turbulent times in ancient Greece and Rome, and how its principles—like courage, temperance, justice, and wisdom—still apply in a world filled with chaos, anxiety, and uncertainty. From shipwrecked merchants to emperors journaling their fears, this episode explores why some of the most powerful figures in history turned to Stoicism not just for answers—but for survival. We also dig into how Stoicism overlaps with modern psychology, why it’s gaining traction among young men, and whether its rising popularity is being misunderstood or misused. If you’ve ever wondered whether Stoicism means being emotionless, if it’s compatible with ambition, or if it actually makes you a better person, this episode is your one-stop masterclass. Get your free PDF guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/stoicism ⇨ Order…

Resilience isn’t about pretending you’re fine or never feeling pain—it’s about learning how to act in your best interest despite the pain. In this episode of Solved, we dive deep into the science, psychology, and real-life examples of resilience—from Ernest Shackleton’s crew surviving two years stranded in Antarctica to my own slightly insane decision to run an endurance race with basically no training. Spoiler: I didn’t die. We cover it all: the biology of resilience, why some people are “dandelions” and thrive anywhere while others are “orchids” who need the right environment, the mindsets that let you push through hardship without losing your mind, and why humor and community might secretly be your best survival tools. And of course, we deliver the real, practical, evidence-based strategies you can actually apply when life inevitably decides to kick you in the teeth. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, stuck, or like you can’t take one more setback, this episode is for you. And if you’re one of those psychos…

Chances are, there’s something in your life you feel deeply ashamed about—something you’ve never told anyone, something you can’t even admit to yourself. In this episode, we go deep into the emotion we all experience but almost no one wants to talk about: shame. Where it comes from, why it’s so powerful, how it screws up our lives—and more importantly, how to deal with it. We cover the biology of shame, the psychology, the evolutionary roots, and how modern life (especially the internet) completely messes with our shame systems. We talk about healthy vs. toxic shame, how it shows up in addiction, relationships, perfectionism, and self-sabotage, and why most of us either try to hide from it or end up being controlled by it. You’ll also hear from members of my team about how shame shaped their lives in surprising ways. As always, this episode is brutally honest, deeply researched, and sprinkled with a few bad jokes. But more than anything, I hope it gives you the awareness—and the tools—to start facing…

Everyone’s obsessed with being happy—but what if that obsession is the very thing making us miserable? Drew and I explore what actually makes us feel good—and why most of us are chasing it in all the wrong ways. We unpack what philosophers like Aristotle and the Buddha got right thousands of years ago—and how modern science is just now catching up. We talk about hedonic vs. eudaimonic happiness, why more money and status don’t necessarily move the needle, and why most self-help advice completely misses the point. Happiness isn’t something you get. It’s a side effect of doing the right things for the right reasons. So, if you're tired of chasing "more" and ready to actually feel a little less miserable, this one’s for you. Get your free PDF guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/happiness CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:42 Is Happiness the Right Goal? 00:11:22 The Origins of Human Happiness 00:11:44 Hedonia vs Eudaimonia 00:15:51 Epicureanism 00:24:00 Eastern Perspectives 00:27:55 Modern Happiness…

What are emotions? Why do we feel anything at all? And more importantly — can we actually get better at feeling? In this episode, Drew and I dive headfirst into what might be the hardest question in all of psychology: what the actual f**k are emotions? We break down the biology, neuroscience, evolution, culture, and even language that shape how we feel — and why we often don’t understand what the hell is going on inside us. From ancient philosophy to brain scans, this is a deep (and occasionally weird) look into the emotional chaos that makes us human. We unpack everything from the origins of emotional intelligence (spoiler: it might be BS) to the science of emotional regulation, attachment styles, and the sneaky ways your culture wires your emotional defaults. Along the way, we explore why some relationships make you feel like a better person while others drain the life out of you, and how trauma, genetics, and childhood with your ability to keep it together. But this episode isn’t just about understanding…

From Plato and Aristotle to Freud and modern research, we break down why we delay the things that matter most—and how to actually stop. This isn't a “just set a timer” productivity talk. We’re diving deep into shame, identity, perfectionism, culture, and why procrastination is ultimately a *skill issue*, not a moral failure. We cover things like: How humans have thought about putting things off for over 2000 years, the real reason you avoid the most important tasks in your life, why “I work better under pressure” is (usually) BS, why self-compassion is actually more motivating than guilt, tons of practical, research-backed strategies you can start using todayAnd much, much, much more. Get your free PDF guide: https://solvedpodcast.com/procrastination CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:05 Episode Roadmap 00:08:20 What exactly is procrastination? 00:15:50 Plato's Thoughts on Procrastination 00:24:07 The Buddhist & Confucian Views on Procrastination 00:26:19 Aristotle's Take on Procrastination…

Welcome to the first episode of the Solved Podcast. Today, we are solving your values. Over eight years ago, I wrote The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck—a book that, underneath all the swearing and irreverence, was really about one thing: values. What do you care about? What’s actually worth your time, your energy, your life? So in this kickoff episode of SOLVED, Drew and I are going deep into why your values are the foundation of everything—your happiness, your mental health, your relationships, your sense of meaning—and why so many of us today feel so lost. We break down the difference between chasing cheap dopamine hits and building real fulfillment, why not all values are created equal, how to figure out what your true values are, how to change your values, how to start living out your values more fully, and how values silently shape your decisions and relationships every day. If you’ve ever felt stuck, directionless, or like you’re living someone else’s life, this episode is the wake-up call you need.…

New podcast launches May 1st! We'll be releasing on this same feed, so all you have to do is stay subscribed to this channel and you'll get all the new episodes as they come out. *** After more than 70 episodes and 30 million downloads, I’ve decided to shut down The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck Podcast. Yeah, I know—sounds a little crazy. But the truth is, I wasn’t having fun anymore. The guest treadmill, the pressure to play nice, the temptation to chase clicks instead of meaning—it all started to feel fake. So, I’m pulling the plug. BUT—I’m not going away. I’m launching something new. It’s called Solved—a no-ads, no-guests, deep-dive podcast where each episode tackles one major life topic and breaks it down thoroughly. Think: values, emotions, procrastination—done right, from every angle, with real research and clear implementation. It’s the podcast I wish already existed. So I’m making it. First episode drops May 1 st! Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less…

I’ve got a special episode for you today. I sat down in person with my longtime friend and first-ever podcast guest, Derek Sivers. We haven’t recorded live before, and honestly, it shows—in the best way. It’s raw, weird, and filled with the kind of conversations we usually when we’re just hanging out together. We dig into Derek’s new book, Useful, Not True, and the big idea behind it: that our beliefs don’t need to be true to be helpful. That spins off into everything from remixing creative influences (metal + Dixieland jazz, anyone?) to why most podcasts—including mine—have gotten painfully predictable. We talk artistic reinvention, Bob Dylan, Bowie, Miles Davis, why most “thought leaders” are just regurgitating each other’s ideas, and why I'm ending the podcast as you know it—and what’s next! We also dive into the deeper stuff: the emotional power of belief, authenticity vs. performative vulnerability, therapy culture, and why sometimes the most liberating thing you can do is reject what everyone else…

In this episode, Drew and I dive into some of the biggest beliefs we’ve shifted over the years—and what it actually looks like to change your mind. We talk about Drew’s evolving views on religion, why I’m way less convinced that people are as changeable as we like to believe, and why I think trauma might be getting a little too much airtime in the self-help world. We also get into the loneliness epidemic, the quiet power of community, and why so much of “personal growth” isn’t about becoming someone new—it’s about learning to work with who you already are. Leave a comment below about what you’ve changed your mind about—and enjoy. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: 72 Episodes and the Work Behind It 00:02:00 Why We Need to Change Our Minds More Often 00:03:14 Drew's Shifting View on Religion 00:04:33 The New Atheism Movement and Its Limitations 00:05:44 Religion's Benefits: Community, Service, and Local Focus 00:06:43 The Dogma Dilemma: Can You Have the Good Without the Bad? 00:13:06 The Feature Is the…

Lewis Howes is one of the most successful podcasters of all time—12 years, nearly 1,800 episodes, and countless interviews with world-class performers. But what’s even more interesting is how his definition of success has evolved over the years. In this conversation, Lewis opens up about shifting from a hyper-competitive, “be number one” mentality to a more collaborative, impact-driven approach. We also dive into emotional regulation, the surprising ways our relationship with money affects our lives, and why most people either idolize or demonize wealth. Oh, and Lewis casually mentions he’s training to compete in the Olympics in his 40s. No big deal. This episode is packed with insights on what it really means to live a fulfilling, abundant life—without losing your mind in the process. Lewis's new book, Make Money Easy: https://www.amazon.com/Make-Money-Easy-Financial-Freedom/dp/1401993931 Lewis's podcast, The School of Greatness: https://lewishowes.com/sogpodcast/ CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction and…

Resilience isn’t just about gritting your teeth and enduring pain—it’s about managing the stories you tell yourself. In this episode, I break down why most people get resilience wrong and how mastering the “second arrow” is the real key to bouncing back. We dive into post-traumatic growth, why caring about something bigger than yourself makes you stronger, and how focusing on what you can control changes everything. We also talk about AI—how it’s not here to save or destroy humanity, but it is going to change everything. We look at how AI is already transforming creative and knowledge-based jobs, why you should be using it right now, and what you can do to stay ahead. Plus, we tackle the ultimate question: Can people change? That three-word question is lot more complex than it seems. Check it out. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Have You Felt the AGI? 00:03:31 The Fuck of the Week: What Resilience Really Is 00:07:09 The Problem With Mental Health Apps 00:10:40 Five Ways to Build Real Resilience…

You know that voice in your head that loves to tell you that you suck? Yeah, that one. The one that compares you to everyone on Instagram, tells you you’re a failure for eating cereal at 11 p.m., and insists you’ll never get your life together. Well, today, we’re calling in a professional to deal with that assh*le. Dr. Julie Smith is a clinical psychologist and viral mental health educator who’s built a massive following by actually making psychology make sense. In this episode, she breaks down how to quiet that inner critic, stop getting crushed by comparison, and reframe your self-loathing into something a little more useful—like self-respect. We also dig into what it’s like to become internet famous when you’re an introvert, why emotions are not facts (even though they feel like they are), and how to stop letting social media, your parents, and your own bullsh*t beliefs define your worth. Whether you’re stuck in a shame spiral, wondering why life feels pointless, or just trying to figure out how to not…

Fear of failure isn’t really about failure—it’s about what failure means to us. We’re not scared of messing up; we’re scared of being judged, embarrassed, or proving our worst insecurities right. But the people who actually succeed at anything are the ones willing to suck at it long enough to get good. Today, we break down why failure feels so terrifying, how social comparison messes with our heads, and why the loudest critics are usually the ones who’ve never done a damn thing themselves. Tune in for some practical tips on overcoming all of this. We also dig into the science of why boredom can spark better ideas, why our addiction to content might be making us less creative, and whether we should all do a digital detox before our brains turn into overstimulated mush. Finally, we wrap things up with a simple but profound question: If life is just an endless series of trade-offs, what are the best problems to have? Because problems never go away—you just get to level up to better ones. The Creative Benefits…

Life in a rock band isn’t all sold-out shows and backstage parties—it’s a high-pressure, all-consuming commitment that tests friendships, sanity, and survival. In this episode, I sit down with Randy Blythe, legendary frontman of Lamb of God, to pull back the curtain on what it really takes to last in the music industry. From the brutal realities of band relationships to the myths of the rockstar lifestyle, Randy shares unfiltered insights on creativity, addiction, and personal transformation. We also dig into his journey to sobriety, the impact of punk rock’s DIY ethos, and the surprising ways today’s generation is redefining rebellion. Whether you’re a musician, a fan, or just someone navigating your own challenges, this conversation is a raw and inspiring look at resilience, reinvention, and the power of staying true to yourself. Randy’s books: Just Beyond the Light: https://www.amazon.com/Just-Beyond-Light-Making-Inside-ebook/dp/B0DJHMN7C1 Dark Days:…

Self-help is supposed to, you know, help. But what if, sometimes, it actually makes things worse? In this episode, we take a hard look at the self-improvement industry that promises transformation but often sells little more than feel-good illusions. From outdated advice that preys on your insecurities to the dopamine hit of "life-changing" content that changes nothing, we break down why self-help often fails the people who need it most. Along with unpacking the biggest traps of self-improvement, Drew and I also tackle whether or not minimalism was just an aesthetic rebellion against our parents’ McMansion dreams. We were both once staunch minimalists and we look back on what we learned and what principles still apply to our lives today. We wrap up with a listener question about the ethics of going to church if you’re an atheist. It’s another grab bag episode full of rabbit holes. Check it out. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: The Chair Situation and What's Coming 00:00:31 Five Problems with the…

Australia, you absolute legends. Back in November, I did a speaking tour across seven cities, talking to thousands of you about life, purpose, relationships, and why giving fewer fucks is the key to actually living a life you don’t hate. We recorded some of the best Q&A moments to share with you here on the podcast. We diving into the big existential stuff—how to stop procrastinating, how to know if a relationship is right for you, and whether Australia’s ban on social media for kids is actually a good thing or not. We’ll also talk about the brutal truth behind imposter syndrome, how to stop caring so much about what other people think, and one thing that actually helps you figure out what the hell you should be doing with your life. Plus, I’ll share some hard-earned wisdom on drinking, quitting, and why people stay in bad relationships way too long. So if you’ve ever felt stuck, lost, or just overwhelmed by the sheer absurdity of life, this one’s for you. Hit play and let’s get into it. CHAPTERS Chapters…

Today, I sit down with Arthur Brooks, a renowned social scientist and happiness expert, for a deep dive into the realms of meaning, faith, and love. Our conversation takes unexpected turns as we explore the intersection of spirituality, psychology, and personal growth. From discussing the evolutionary roots of our search for meaning to examining the role of faith in modern life, this episode challenges conventional wisdom and offers fresh perspectives on age-old questions. We cover a wide range of topics, including the importance of boredom in fostering creativity, the dangers of political activism as a substitute for religion, and the keys to a successful marriage. Arthur shares insights from his work with the Dalai Lama, explains why young men are increasingly turning to religion, and offers advice on finding meaning in a world dominated by technology. Whether you're grappling with questions of faith, seeking to understand the nature of love, or simply looking for ways to live a more fulfilling life, this…

Drew comes in hot today as we dig into the nitty gritty of confidence and motivation. We explore the counterintuitive idea that true confidence doesn't come from expecting success, but from being comfortable with failure. If you've ever struggled with self-doubt or felt demotivated despite external achievements, this episode might just change your perspective. We start by dissecting what I call the "Confidence Conundrum" and how it applies to various aspects of life, from business to relationships. Then, we challenge some long-held beliefs about intrinsic and extrinsic motivation, discussing research that questions the idea that external rewards always undermine our natural interests. We wrap up with a thought-provoking exploration of Internal Family Systems theory and how understanding the different "parts" of our psyche can lead to greater self-integration. This is a grab bag episode that we had a lot of fun with, so I hope you enjoy it CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Drew Comes In Hot 00:01:29…

Today, I'm joined by my old friend Tim Urban, the mastermind behind the wildly popular blog Wait But Why. Known for his ability to break down complex topics with humor and stick-figure drawings, Tim has captured the attention of millions worldwide. From his early days as a blogger to the release of his first book, "What's Our Problem?: A Self-Help Book for Societies," Tim has consistently delivered thought-provoking content that challenges our understanding of the world around us. In this episode, we dive into pressing issues like unfettered tribalism, the concept of "idea prisons," and the potential impact of AI on society. Tim also shares personal insights as a new parent and teases his upcoming book. It'll challenge your perspectives and leave you craving more of Tim's signature blend of depth, wit, and accessibility. Don't miss this captivating conversation that tackles the complexities of our modern world head-on. Tim’s blog: Wait, But Why?: https://waitbutwhy.com/ Tim’s book: What’s Our Problem:…

Ever feel like culture’s splitting into countless micro-worlds where everyone’s just vibing to their own thing? In this episode, I introduce my theory on the "Jazzification of Everything." Drew and I dive into how our subcultures of music, entertainment, and even personal obsessions have evolved into these aging communities, totally detached from the cultural monocultures of the past. Whether it’s metal fans in their forties or electronic music lovers growing older with their favorite DJs, we explore how the media landscape and algorithms have encouraged us to stick to what we know—and why this shift could be both a gift and a curse. We also dig into why “premium mediocre” is taking over our consumer habits, and whether or not that’s actually a bad thing. We discuss how these tiny, exclusive-seeming trends might be fooling us, offering superficial luxuries instead of anything truly valuable. We cap it off with a big question about whether chasing after anything is worth it, or if we’re just dooming ourselves…

In this special New Year's episode of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck podcast, we dive into the perennial challenge of making meaningful changes in our lives. Rather than falling into the typical "new year, new you" trap that leads most people to abandon their resolutions by February, Drew and I explore a different approach to personal transformation. We share our own struggles with perfectionism, control, and finding purpose. We also dig into some research about how evolution may have shaped our sense of purpose, the science of habit formation, and offer practical strategies for making lasting changes. Whether you're setting goals for the new year or just trying to build better habits, this episode will help you approach personal growth with more wisdom and less pressure in 2025. Enjoy. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: New Year, New You... Again 00:02:18 Last Year's Resolutions: How Did We Do? 00:03:39 The Fuck of the Year: Drew's Battle with Perfectionism 00:06:24 Making Abstract Goals…

This week, we dive headfirst into the messy, uncomfortable topic of regret. From the aches and grays that come with hitting a new decade to the deeper realizations about relationships, selfish mistakes, and missed opportunities, we unpack how regret shapes who we are. And there's a twist: what if regret isn’t something to fear or avoid? What if it’s a tool for growth? I share my own stories of taking people for granted, self-destructive habits, and the lessons I’ve learned about self-forgiveness and choosing your regrets wisely. We also tackle some fascinating questions about whether empathy is actually good for society. Is it always a good thing, or can it sometimes lead us astray? To round things off, we share our thoughts on AI and its impact on creativity and human connection. Enjoy. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Welcome to 40: Turning Points and Reflection 00:02:10 The Regret Conversation: Looking Back on Life at 40 00:03:15 Identity and Experience: Why Mark Doesn't Do Regret 00:04:48 The Five Regrets of…

Today, we dive into the fascinating world of luck, risk, and how they shape our lives. We explore the delicate balance between playing it safe and taking chances, and why understanding this balance is crucial for personal growth. If you've ever wondered whether you're too cautious or not cautious enough, then strap in for this one. We dig into the psychology of luck, examining how our perceptions influence our outcomes, and why taking calculated risks can lead to outsized returns. We also tackle the tough question of how to cope with life's inevitable hardships. Hopefully this gives you a fresh perspective on risk-taking and a new appreciation for the role of chance in your life. Enjoy. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 The Tesla Disaster and the Doghouse 00:02:22 The Fuck of the Week: How Lucky Are You? 00:03:17 Luck Is Just Risk Management 00:05:21 The Four Ways to Create Your Own Luck 00:10:30 Counterfactual Thinking: It Could Always Be Worse 00:13:56 The Natural Fail Rate of Life 00:15:21 Poker and Thinking in…

You ever notice how some people can’t stand being told what to do—even when the advice is good? Yeah, that’s me. In this episode, Drew and I dig into why so many of us rebel against advice, why others chase it like their life depends on it, and whether all that “actionable advice” we’re constantly fed is actually helping anyone. Spoiler: I’m not a fan of cookie-cutter solutions, and I’ve got some opinions about the self-help industry’s obsession with telling people exactly what to do. We also get into the bigger picture—how advice often misses the mark when it’s not tailored to someone’s unique situation, and how therapy culture might be trying to replace something deeper that’s missing in our lives. I’ll share why I don’t give rigid life hacks, the trouble with universal solutions, and the surprising reason why most breakthroughs aren’t about the advice at all. If you’re tired of “do this, don’t do that” advice, this one’s for you. Enjoy. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: The Compulsive Contrarian…

Have you ever felt like there’s more to life than the daily grind, like your dreams are buried under all the obligations and expectations life throws at you? In this episode, we sit down with The Buried Life co-founder and New York Times bestselling author, Ben Nemtin, to explore why so many of us feel disconnected from our true purpose—and how to reclaim it. For Ben, it all started as a group of friends chasing wild bucket-list dreams and helping strangers achieve their dreams too. In the process, they discovered what it means to give yourself permission to dream and then make those dreams a reality. We dive deep into the psychology of fear, the power of accountability, and the surprising benefits of doing what you love—not just for yourself, but for everyone around you. We discuss why most people regret not living authentically, how to overcome the social and emotional barriers holding you back, and practical strategies for rediscovering your dreams, even if they’ve been buried for years. If you’re looking…

Life has a way of just kind of happening to you. And while exactly what happens is unique to each of us, we all seem to go through very similar stages of our lives. Today, we talk about the challenges of these stages. Each stage comes with its own “crisis” that, if navigated well, can propel us to the next stage. It is this never-ending struggle where life happens. And then… Drew gets all new age and Mark just isn’t having it. And we round it out with a very simple, yet very difficult question from a listener: How much is enough? Enjoy. The Four Stages of Life by Mark Manson:https://markmanson.net/four-stages-of-life The Art of the Interesting by Lorraine Besser: https://www.amazon.com/Art-Interesting-What-Pursuit-Cultivate/dp/1538743205 CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: The Tolerance Paradox 00:02:46 The Four Stages of Life Framework 00:04:21 Stage One: Mimicry and the Crisis of Identity 00:06:53 Stage Two: Exploration and the Novelty Trap 00:09:47 Peter Pan Syndrome and Extended Adolescence 00:10:51…

Wouldn’t it be great if we dropped all the bullsh*t about modern dating? No more games. No more fake, flaky people. No more texting back and forth for weeks or even months only to find out you have zero chemistry when you meet up in person. No more f*cking bots and AI generated dating profiles… Sabrina Zohar definitely thinks we can skip all of it and get right down to the fun stuff (oh yeah, baby!). All it requires is brutal honesty with yourself and the people you’re interested in. So if you can stomach that, this episode is right up your alley. We ask Sabrina: What does your attachment style really tell you about how you should date? Are dating apps really that terrible, or can we change the way we use them to get better results? And do we have high standards, or are our expectations just too f*cking high And a whole lot more. We had a lot of fun in the studio with Sabrina. I hope you enjoy it too. About Sabrina Zohar Sabrina Zohar is the multi-faceted entrepreneur and media figure responsible for…

Today, we’re diving deep into the subtle difference between a healthy routine and a rut. How can you tell if your daily grind is keeping you grounded… or just grinding you down? Next, we tackle the question of boredom: Why does it feel so unbearable, and could we actually be missing out on its hidden perks? Spoiler alert—boredom might just be the key to unlocking your most creative, inspired self. Finally, we confront one of life’s biggest dilemmas: When is it time to walk away, and when should you double down? Whether it’s a project that’s going nowhere or a relationship that feels like it’s on life support, we’ll give you insights on knowing when to quit and when to stick it out. Enjoy. Brilliant or Bullshit Paper: Just think: The challenges of the disengaged mind https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4330241/ CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Am I Becoming a Boring Person? 00:01:11 When Does a Routine Become a Rut? 00:02:53 The Alcohol Factor: Craving Novelty vs. Craving Stability 00:03:41 Fear…

What are you called to do in life? What is your life’s task? And once you figure that out, how do you pursue it? The one and only Robert Greene sat down with us on the pod to talk about all of these questions and a whole more. We discuss finding and pursuing one’s life task, the nature and causes of “Peter Pan Syndrome”, science vs timeless wisdom on life, figuring out what do in midlife after you’ve taken the wrong path, and a much more. Enjoy. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Robert Greene in the Flesh 00:00:43 The Resurgence of The 48 Laws of Power 00:05:57 The Dark Side vs. The Real Robert 00:08:11 The Theatrical Nature of Social Life 00:09:22 Finding Your Life's Task: Robert's Journey 00:12:58 Reading the Signs: Positive and Negative Feedback 00:15:10 Persistence vs. Knowing When to Pivot 00:18:00 The Pain You Enjoy: Finding Your True Work 00:21:43 Reconnecting With Your Life's Task 00:25:25 The Five Forms of Intelligence 00:29:13 Brilliant or Bullshit: Peter Pan Syndrome 00:32:00 The Problem…